How my days have gone
|
Posted:Oct 28, 2006 4:27 am
Last Updated:Dec 20, 2008 9:48 am
2369 Views
|
Wow. I remember writing this three years ago. Realizing I was developing feelings for him,I tried to keep my distance. Didn't last too long.
I'm not sure why I started writing down little excerpts from my day, but thought I'd share it with you.
Sunday Morning It's only been a few hours since he left and I don't really now what to do with myself. I keep trying not to think about him but in the process of trying not to, I find myself thinking about me trying not to think about him. Hmmmm, this doesn't seem to be working.
At 9:00 I was still awake lying in bed just missing him, all the while telling myself I don't. By 11:30 I decided I needed to get my day off to a start so I forced myself into the shower and out the house to get my nails done. The last time I was getting my nails done he called me on the way to karate class. After that I decided to come home and do laundry and thought about the day we went to do his laundry. On my trip back up from putting the clothes in the dryer I came across the peanut butter I had been looking for and thought about him falling asleep on my lap in the parking lot. I then went for a drive but that only led me to think about the nights we drove together. This "trying to get him off my mind" thing is not working. In time, I suppose. Guess I will try to get some sleep.
Monday Well, I figured since I was back to work today it would be much easier for me to get through my days. After all, I spent all night watching the clock waiting for the night to end so I can hurry up and get to work, believing I wouldn't have much "thinking time" on my hands. I then spent all day praying the time would fly by so I could get some sleep. It's just another Monday morning, I thought. It's been a little more than 24 hours since we last had any contact. I picked up my phone and put it on the bathroom counter as I took a shower just in case I had my "good morning" call. Wasn't there. Well, maybe on the way to work I will call since he will be on his way to work also. Well, I shouldn't do that. It's okay, soon I'll have a room full of coworkers to converse with.
It's lunch time now. I turn my phone on but shortly realize I have no one to call so I head out on my daily lunch routine and pick up the mail at the post office, decide after 15 minutes of pondering on different food choices that I wanted a hot and spicy with tomato so I swung by and grabbed one on my way back to the bank. I took one bite, realized there weren't any tomatoes on it and decided I was no longer hungry. Okay, so now I have another half an hour to not think about him. Tick...tick...tick...
Almost time to go home. Can't wait to get out of here so I can call.... Well, that thought was interrupted before it was completed. It's okay, I have a lot to do anyhow. Well, here I am, sitting in front of this computer. Yup, too much to do right now. Way too much.
Tuesday Spent the night watching the clock again but, hey, this getting him off my mind thing is getting much easier. I only thought about him once all day. This morning my phone rang at about 10 till 8 and although it wasn't him, I did think about our "before work" conversations. But that was it! Didn't think about him the rest of the day. Except when I got to work and a guy on a motorcycle was at the ATM. But after that I didn't think about him again. Oh, wait a second, I finally found something to laugh about and thought about how I wasn't going to call him to share my laugh with. Guess that means I thought about him again. Oh yeah, I did think about him when CXXX SXXXXX came in to cash his check. Sweet man he is. And then I did think about him when I was faxing some forms, but that only took a second to do so it doesn't really count. Oh, and I almost forgot, I thought about him from 2-3 - lunch hour, what else could I do? And then there was that hair on the passenger seat that wasn't mine...too light, could have been anyone's though. Alright, so maybe I thought about him a few times after that too but they were all just little thoughts here and there. No big deal. And I am writing this now so does that count as thinking about him?
It's okay though, because I am not missing him and I don't really think about him. He just happens to cross my mind every now and again. But nope, I sure don't miss him.
This sure was a slow moving day. Time for a bath.
I finally brought myself to look up at the stars. I haven't done so since our trip back from L.A.. There they are - the same stars. The very same ones we pulled over and watched before engaging in other activities. The same stars that followed our trip to and from. The same stars that he held me under so many times before. There they were. I just wanted to take out the trash.
Well, here is the night I waited all day to get to. All I want is some fuckin' sleep
chad77915Even then, three days away from your arms was way too long to go.
|
|
2
Comments
|
|
Hey Bedroomice...these weren"t just words
|
Posted:Oct 26, 2006 8:32 pm
Last Updated:Feb 6, 2007 4:53 pm
2339 Views
|
With no regards to the fact that we had all night to take our time, I wrapped my arms around your body and pulled it to mine. There was no mistaking my need for you to invade the space that was once mine. Taking just a moment to feel your eyes search mine, I slide my hands across your lower back, and then down, grabbing a firm hold of your ass. My slithering wetness brazenly invites your hard on to pleasure me, and my kiss promises you nothing short of euphoric delight. You slowly but firmly slide into me before slowly pulling partially back out. My body shivers as you swim in my warm juices. And again, and again, you make your gradual entrances and partial exits. I tilt my head forward and tuck it under your chin, afraid that you might see what my face is trying to hide. But, my body betrays me, and reveals everything.
You feel me tighten up around you, and you can hear my heart pounding strongly against your chest. I rope your body with my legs and force you so deep inside of me. I'm not even sure how to justify my impatience as I rock back and forth, driving you in and out of me with such purpose.
|
|
3
Comments
|
|
I wonder if you are sleeping...
|
Posted:Aug 6, 2006 4:48 am
Last Updated:Feb 6, 2007 4:50 pm
2511 Views
|
I want so bad to pick up the phone and call you. I want you to join me, again, but it's so late, and you just got home not too long ago. You felt so good. I want to take you in again. Have you really been trying for eight months?
And for ALL the kisses I got tonight...wow...I look forward to reliving each and every one again in my dreams.
I dare not choose a mood for this one.
|
|
1
comment
|
|
What to do...
|
Posted:Aug 4, 2006 6:13 pm
Last Updated:Feb 5, 2007 6:18 pm
2509 Views
|
You are on a , galloping at a constant speed. On your right side is a sharp drop off, and on your left side is an elephant traveling at the same speed as you. Directly in front of you is a galloping kangaroo and your is unable to overtake it. Behind you is a lion running at the same speed as you and the kangaroo. What must you do to safely get out of this highly dangerous situation?
Get your drunk ass off the merry-go-round
|
|
2
Comments
|
|
Whom shall I thank?
|
Posted:Aug 4, 2006 3:09 am
Last Updated:Feb 6, 2007 4:54 pm
2453 Views
|
Alright, you know who you are and you know what you did, so fess up. I owe you. Sure, it was something so simple, but you did in one night, what I couldn't do in months. So come, let me thank you. And yes, it does involve tallblueblond
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
Revealed: Why I won"t use Charmin
|
Posted:Aug 1, 2006 9:57 pm
Last Updated:Feb 5, 2007 5:58 pm
2202 Views
|
I guess somewhere in one of my blog entries, I mentioned that I won't use Charmin. Who knew the wonder of why I ban a certain toilet paper from my home would linger on some minds still today.
If you must know, I won't use Charmin because it leaves too much butt lint.
I hope this can put your minds at ease now that the long unanswered question has been answered.
|
|
1
comment
|
|
herotherside has winked at you 1 time in the last month
|
Posted:Aug 1, 2006 1:12 am
Last Updated:Aug 19, 2009 6:24 am
2160 Views
|
You know, I never really go through my winks. Since I am a standard member, what good does it do? I can't respond. All I can do is wink back. So, I decided to go through them today just to see who has been winking at me and I winked back at those who didn't have a problem with my body type or race. (If I didn't wink back at you, don't feel bad, I only chose a handful at random to go through.) So, we'll see where it leads.
Another thing I did was look at random profiles. I usually just stick to looking at the ones of those who have emailed me or I'll take a look at some when I'm in the chat room. My, my am I amazed at all the long/thick endowments claimed on this site. And yes, I did just say claimed. Alright guys and gals, I think we need to stop the lies! We need to stop agreeing when asked, "I have a big cock, don't I?" And for those moments when your man is talking dirty and says something to the effect of, "You want me to stick you with this big dick," and it is the size of your ring finger, tell them you would love them to, and then pull out your dildo and hand it to him. And my ultimate favorite, "Ever seen one this big?" Let's just say right about here I am LMFAO. I used to just shoot them a fake smile and not comment unless they push, and at that point I did tell them the truth. But, from now on, I will not wait till then. I will answer them truthfully the first time around, whether it be a yes or a no.
Alright, enough on that. I get many emails, and I am very flaky at responding to them or even reading them. So, I send out an apology to anyone waiting for a response. I try to answer them all, but I usually wait until Affair Link is about to delete them before getting to them. I really do appreciate receiving them, but as a standard member, I can only respond to so many a day, and when I get backed up, I lose hope on getting my inbox emptied.
So, I got an interesting email yesterday. Someone finally revealed having an interest in me for some time, but was too afraid to admit it. Truth be told, I've had an interest in him for some time too, but never worked up the nerve to tell him. And so, for a good while now, we just flirted here and there in the chat room, neither of us brave enough to reveal our "secret." But, we are making progress, we've both just sent out our first emails to each other. Who knows where we'll go from here. Maybe in another three months one might ask the other for a phone number! Come back and ask me in a year and a half or so if we've met yet.
On the other hand, there is one person I've been chatting with whom I have no problem stating my desires. He knows just how I want him, when I want him, and where I want him. He knows every detail in my fantasies of him, right down to where his hair is tickling me. I too, know just how he wants me.
Though neither of us is tied down, I get this feeling of excitement as one does when they are on their way to see someone they are having an affair with. We usually meet up in the South West chat room in the early morning or late at night. Sneaking out of bed, I know that somewhere between the time I tip toe down the hallway and out to where I have my keyboard rendezvous, the 110 miles between us will dissipate.
Like a crime in progress,I steal moments of his time before kidnapping him and locking him behind the doors of my imagination. He becomes a prisoner of my fantasies as I taint his mind with long lasting intimate portraits of myself. It's not long before he usurps and convicts me. He sentences me to a confinement of his own prose.
|
|
1
comment
|
|
Prisoner
|
Posted:Jul 23, 2006 10:51 pm
Last Updated:Aug 18, 2009 7:01 pm
2059 Views
|
I feel like a prisoner to my own body, and it has me locked in solitary confinement. It has a tight grip on me, it has me surrounded. No chance of escape. I only hope I am serving a one life term sentence and not more. The sentence so harsh, I wonder what I did in a past life to deserve it. Must have been something pretty bad. Like a fool, I sit hopeful, but I know my chances of escape are slimmer than none. I know there isn't gonna be time off for good behavior. All I can do is sit here and listen to the sound of my bones creak and crackle and pop. All I can do is try to turn my attention to one of the four walls around me when my neck feels as if is strangling me. Why won't you just let me go? I only hope I don't live to be an old lady.
|
|
1
comment
|
|
Somewhere out there...
|
Posted:Jul 14, 2006 1:37 am
Last Updated:Feb 5, 2007 6:04 pm
2189 Views
|
My body aches so bad today. I have backed out of quite a few dates due to my aches and pain. Each one of them thought that as a blow off.
I know somewhere out there is someone who understands what its like to hurt and there isn't much to do about it, and I know there is someone out there I will try every remedy in the book for when they are in pain.
I know somewhere out there is someone who will hand me my keys each and every time I drop them on the way to the mailbox, and I know there is someone out there I will put the keys in my pocket for the second time I drop them.
I know somewhere out there is someone who will not be angry at me when I only bowl through three frames, and I know there is someone out there I will bowl a forth one for just so I can catch up.
I know somewhere out there is someone who will watch as I struggle to open a bottle of water and not offer any help so I don't feel incompetent, and I know there is someone out there I will just hand the bottle to when I give up.
I know somewhere out there is someone who will see that I am struggling to open a jar as I am cooking and open it for me, and I know there is someone out there I will ask to help me.
I know somewhere out there is someone who will let me cry it out when I feel like a uncoordinated , and I know there is someone out there I won't be ashamed to grab a hold of when I feel unbalanced.
I know somewhere out there is someone who will hold me so close at night when I can't sleep, and I know there is someone out there I will continue to hold all night long despite the pain.
|
|
1
comment
|
|
Room 238, 8:00
|
Posted:Jul 5, 2006 4:12 am
Last Updated:Dec 20, 2008 9:26 am
2258 Views
|
I cleaned out my car and found that written on a white napkin. Do you remember that day we were sitting in my car? You asked me if I was sure I was ready, I said I may not even show up. That was well over a year ago.
Looking at that white napkin,stained with ink from a black felt tip pen, reminded me of that day I was standing there in that white dress with the silver design. As I twirled around in that room, surrounded by all those mirrors, you said I looked like Cinderella. I'll let you in on a secret. I felt much prettier than she.
|
|
2
Comments
|
|
Until my body protects my heart
|
Posted:Jun 16, 2006 6:08 am
Last Updated:Dec 20, 2008 9:27 am
2335 Views
|
Some where along the way, I'll learn to stop caring. You will know when that time comes because you will see the rest of me out on the welcome mat where my heart has been laying my whole life. Until then, I'll just continue to let the world walk on me, unarmed.
Mood: Angry, annoyed, cold, cynical, depressed, etc.
All in all, I feel like a fabricated microcosm sitting dormant in a miasmatic mine.
|
|
1
comment
|
|
They sounds just the same today as they did many years ago
|
Posted:Jun 14, 2006 8:57 am
Last Updated:Aug 19, 2009 6:27 am
2334 Views
|
Who knew these words I wrote back in February would come into play again so soon. Yes, think twice, more if needed, think long and hard before uttering those words...
HALT! Do not touch me with those hands. I clearly see the lust-burning embers escaping. Put your hands in mine and watch the steam rise as your fire goes out. Don't look so surprised at the ashes falling around us. Think twice before you utter those words I saw mingling in a glass of crushed ice. I care not to hear your chilled uninspiring ensemble taken from the back cover of a magazine. Do not blame that cold breeze passing in the night for it has nothing to do with my lips you see blue. My lips are cold and they are cold for you.
As for my mood, I am lurking in caution. Take that how ever you may.
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
Crash and Bang
|
Posted:Jun 13, 2006 4:57 pm
Last Updated:Feb 5, 2007 6:24 pm
2486 Views
|
You know those moments of pure stupidity that leave you asking, "What the fuck?" Had one the other night. Not sure what I was dreaming about, but I fell asleep in an odd position. I was on my stomach, facing left with my right foot pointed out to the right, left leg crossed over the top of the right, toes wrapped underneath my right leg. Don't ask. Somewhere along the way, my big toe fell asleep and I woke up just as it started to tingle. I immediately started shaking my foot vigorously to get the "snake" which was clamped down on my big toe off. Now, in the kitchen, right up against the fridge, there was a metal bowl on the counter which, when the generator kicked on, created a soft humming rattle. So, here in the dark, on all fours, I decided to inch toward the edge of the bed, to see were the snake landed, (not sure whose bed I thought I was in, I have a twin) and fell right the fuck off. Now, I'm a big ass girl. 5'1", 170lbs. This was not just a little "thunk." This was a pretty loud crash and bang. It scared the poor down stairs. I heard him jump up out of his bed and ask, "What the fuck was that?" So, in my moment of embarrassment, I didn't want to get back on the bed and make any more noise, as my bed is not too quiet, so I backed up against it, pulled the comforter down along with a pillow. Then, I decided to pull four more pillows to create a barrier around me. Um...yeah...that will stop it from getting to me. And besides, what made me think the snake had not already crawled underneath the bed. It took me a good twelve minutes or so to realize what I was doing. Why that long, you ask? Well, I was trying to follow the sound of the rattle in the dark! Be that the last time I eat pumpkin seeds before I go to bed. They don't seem to mix to well with Percocet.
And as for my mood, since it is not one of the options, I choose....idiotic
|
|
3
Comments
|
|
To link to this blog (herotherside) use [blog herotherside] in your messages.
|
|
Sun |
Mon |
Tue |
Wed |
Thu |
Fri |
Sat |
|
1
|
2
|
3
|
4
|
5
|
6
|
7
|
8
|
9
|
10
|
11
|
12
|
13
|
14
|
15
|
16
|
17
|
18
|
19
|
20
|
21
|
22
|
23
|
24
|
25
|
26
|
271
|
28
|
29
|
30
|
311
|
|
|
|
|