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Explanations of sexual relationship tiers
Explanations of sexual relationship tiers I feel like there is some confusion about what these terms are. I will explain all the terms as I view them so you guys can understand where my head is at and clear up some confusion. Friend with benefits- This is when both of you actually invest time in becoming friends after you find each other fuckably hot. It means you want to spend time meeting to do sexual exploration. Fulfilling and expanding each other's sexual kinks and proclivities. This is the most ideal sexual relationship for me. This is when I’ve find a man intellectually, physically and sexually exciting. The guy invests some time in getting to know about my sexual proclivities and kinks. Getting to know each other in a friend manner so you can hang out. When a guy posts that he isn't looking for pen pal; I pretty much write him off. For me this part is important to build trust and comfort because in order to be open and not fear judgement. Also, I like hotel sex and public sex so I want someone I can go out roaming around five boroughs looking for fun spots to get it on. Being comfortable and being on the same page for sexual exploration seems only possible in a FWB relationship. I’ve never had any true FWB but I did have a fuckbuddy that was close to it. We had an on and off thing for a couple of years until he found a serious girlfriend. Fuck buddy This is when you find each other fuckably hot. You establish a regular fuck meets. This is your backup who is available whenever the need strikes. You’re on friendly terms but don’t really hang out other for sex. I’ve had this before and it is really fun but there isn’t a lot of sexual exploration involved. It’s mostly about having someone available to scratch an itch. I’ve had a handful of these when I was younger and in between relationships. Some were better than others but overall it’s good for hot sex if not the most adventurous sex. Hookups This is when you meet someone hot for dating but it turns out to be sex because you don’t see it going anywhere but still want to fuck the person to make the date worthwhile. I’ve only done this once. Generally, if a guy asks me out and I go; I’m genuinely interested in him for a relationship. But once I did go on nowheresville date. He was fuckably hot so I hooked up with him. Usually hookups are one nighters or have the lifespan of 2-3 meets before it dies or moves into a fuck buddy situation. Bootycalls This is when you have a late night urge and can’t sleep until you cum because masturbating to porn simply isn't cutting it. You skim through all your contacts to look for someone you had sex with who will be desperate enough to come over in the middle of the night to fuck and leave. I think this is often confused as a hookup nowadays. I’ve never gone over to a guys place for a booty call but I have called in a few booty calls in my younger days. I’ve never had a guy who won’t come over when I called for some late night relief and leave right after. Booty calls seem silly when you hit your 30s. One nightstands This use to be you’re out at a bar or outing. Nowadays, you can get on an app. Swipe on someone hot and get match. After some flirty text you meet at your place or your matches. If you meet at a bar, you do some flirting and drinking. After some sexy chatting you offer to either go home or back at your hottie’s place for a night of sex. Generally, if you leave right after or stay until the morning if you’re too drunk to make the trek home. Then do walk of shame home in the morning if you don’t have cab money which is mostly the case because you have spent it all on drinks. For apps- you can meet for a drink and go to a place for fucking. Unless neither of you want to make niceties and just go over for straight sex. Most of the time it doesn’t require sleepovers because there is always an Uber to pick you up. There’s never the walk of shame unless you can’t get an Uber ride home. I’ve done a couple of one night stands. Well 2 1/2. The first one was at a birthday party. I got so drunk and horny I agreed to go back to my hotel. When we made it back to the hotel I lost my bear goggles and saw who I invited back to my hotel. He stoned Out of his mind and didn’t want to leave. Eventually I did manage to get him to leave. The second time I did it on a dare. I went out with some girlfriends on a pickup and take home dare game. The guy was lackluster. He lived around from the bar. I did go home with him. I was trying to make the best of the situation. He couldn’t ask for oral but pushed my head so he never go oral. I let him fuck me because I was horny. He had beer dick. He fucked until he came and then passed out. After that I left myself out and took the train home in the middle of the night. The last one night stand was with a friend of some friends. The sex was enjoyable but fuzzy. I’ve never done a one night stand with any apps. These are extremely sad when you're anywhere over 30 in my opinion. One offs and drop offs This is the last one I want to touch upon since I've only experienced them after being on Affair Link. This is when you meet someone hot and interesting who you want to have something ongoing with but either you or your playmate decides you don’t want to meet again. It can be bad sex, not matching sexually or lack of availability. I’ve had mostly one-offs here. There have been a couple of guys who I’ve met twice and became drop offs. One I'd dropped off because he was a one trick pony. The other dropped me off because he found someone he had better sexual chemistry with over me. Sadly, these kind of playdates happen more often than I think from all the men and women I've spoken to here. Finding a FWB is almost everyone's elusive unicorn. There have been two people I had spoken to who did find a FWB. So it isn't an impossibility. Just elusive. That’s all the tiers of sexual relationships as I know it and my experiences with it. I hope this clears up any confusion most of you guys have here and what you’re actually looking for so I don’t keep wasting my time with people who don’t know what they are after. |
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I've had countless one offs/drop offs on Affair Link and I don't know why. Even when the chemistry seems to be there and the sex is satisfying the guys often disappear. Sometimes the guys reappear out of no where looking to hook up again. I'm ok with a one time thing but just wish people were more open about what they want. This was a good post.
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