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Watching, part 1
Watching, part 1 Oh lorday, I'm so high right now. High from just sex. Just got back from my fwb's place where he had one of his girl playthings with him all night. I went there after work, and I'm glad I did. I almost said NO. This girl had a fantasy where she wanted to be watched, and apparently they had talked about it tonight with him creating the idea in his head that I was the candidate as watcher. It was a tough sell; why would i want to just watch? He had sent me two pics of his activities with her already- apparently clothespins were the accessory du jour. He also said that i could direct things, and eventually join but it still felt like i was going to be shortchanged on this deal. A beautiful pussy right in front of me and I can't lick it? His cock ready for attention, and I can't suck it? No skin, no body heat, no fingers and lips on me? No touching anyone but myself?? It sounded so bogus. I was even starting to get angry about being cheated out of all that pleasure, and this was before I even got on the road to drive to his place. I was about to throw a tantrum as profound as a who can't reach the lollipops. Yes, I really am that childish when it comes to getting sexual pleasure. So, I drive to his place, thoroughly prepared to pout, get frustrated, and maybe even just leave if I can't take being excluded. "Do I have to hide in the closet?", I snarkily texted him. As I drove, I was thinking about the girl, someone he has known a long while and that we have shared in a 3some (once? twice? its a blur). She is submissive and sweet and deliciously responsive. I remembered her pussy, how sensitive her clit gets, how we had fingered her together until she squirted all over us, kissing her between her panting and sighs , feeling and hearing her cum when I fist her or he fingers her or we lick her together. And I can't have any tonight? Why did I agree to this nonsense? My clit was already throbbing, pulsing harder the closer I got to his house. I got off the highway and then more thoughts came, seizing me with urgent need and unquestionable determination. I was thinking about him, now. He knows my body so well, plays orgasms out of me with intuitive movements of his hands. I don't wonder or question what he does to me when we play; I'm in sexual oblivion where there is no thought or analytical ability, only sensation and astounding pleasure. I crave his fingers, his body against mine, crave that place where I moan and beg until he makes me cum, and finally I scream from the overwhelming experience. I need his touch. That I would only watch his fingers move but not feel them, see his body but not touch it.....this was beyond unacceptable, it was impossible. I couldn't do it. No way. Then, worse thoughts, painful to think, and turning me on at the same time. His cock: in my ass, my mouth, my pussy, my hand, my mouth, my mouth, my mouth. The nasty names he calls me, the way he talks, his hand pressing on the back of my head, witnessing and feeling and tasting him cum, how he groans with a sound that alone nearly brings me to my own orgasm......... I can't take that level of tease, its not worth it to torture myself. I like people to have their fantasies fulfilled but this would just be<b> masochism </font></b>for me. I contemplated just driving home, texting that I wasn't feeling it, that he should just have fun and I'd talk to him to hear the story tomorrow. Then I reminded myself that I was committed to 'yes' and that 'no' wasn't a useful way to address dubious situations. It's cliché, but I only regret the times I have said no to things and was left wondering 'what if'. 'YES' has never failed me. Yet. So, I went. He let me in the house, then down the stairs to his bedroom. I opened the door and BEHOLD, the naked woman reclining on his bed, as welcoming and delectable as can be. After the darkness of the stairs and hallway, the sudden brightness of the room and her nude body of pale skin against the red blanket brought to mind baroque paintings, images of a hedonistic heaven, and fantasies that are still unsated despite having been enacted over and over. Of course I would eventually have her. Of course. Look at her laying there like that, smiling politely, pretending she is sleepy and unintentionally creating an even more erotic image in doing so. I smiled to myself. Sure, I will hide in the closet, stay clothed, watch and witness, wait and wait and wait, whatever it takes. Its already worth it. |
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