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Older Women vs. Younger Women
Older Women vs. Younger Women The terms "Older" and "Younger" are of course subjective based on your own age, but my Tasty Texas Treat mrfucktone523 at the tender age of 21 might want to read this to fully appreciate the contents of the can of 39 year old whoop-ass he's attempting to open, lol. True, I have wine in my cellar older than he is, but it might not be as tasty... This one's for you, Kiddo - take note of the items in parentheses. Thanks to nice_n_naughti1 nice_n_naughti1 for the ! His original version can be found herepost 2742984]. And because I believe in sharing both sides of the story, be sure to read phaedrus61616 Phaedrus61616's thoughts on [post 2586209]. If the younger ladies or fellas (e.g., anyone under 30) have a rebuttal, bring it on ! Wait- are any of my readers under 30, lol? **An older woman will never wake you up in the middle of the night and ask you, "What are you thinking?" An older woman doesn't care what you think. (Damn Skippy! Who said you could stay the night?) **An older woman always carries a condom in her purse. A younger woman is still hoping the guy might have one on him. (Um. Yeah. I don't do this. Anymore.) ** An older women takes charge of the situation. An older woman will call you up and ask you for a date. A younger woman will wait forever by the phone for you to call. (I don't ask men for dates. I text them for ass.) ** Older women know how to cook. Young women know how to dial Pizza Hut take out. (I will cook for you and make you do the dishes naked.) **Older women often own an interesting collection of lingerie that they have acquired from admirers over the years. Young women often don't wear underwear, if at all, thus practically eliminating all possibility of a striptease. (Not only will I strip for you, I'll provide the 3D glasses!) **Older women know what Kegel exercises are. (I can crack a walnut. Nuff said.) **Older women are experienced. They understand that sometimes, after 12 beers, a guy just can't get it up. A younger woman may need some time to grasp this fact. (If you need 12 beers to build up the courage to sleep with me, you're probably too scared to follow through anyway.) **An older woman will introduce you to all of her girlfriends. A younger woman will avoid her girlfriends when she's with you, in case you get any ideas... (Not applicable. If we see my friends in public, I may claim that you are mugging me.) **An older woman has lots of girlfriends ... and most of them will want to screw you too. (This may be true. But I don't share my toys.) Anyone have anything to add? Let me just grab my bifocals... When it comes to sex, I need a STRONG connection. Otherwise, the page just keeps buffering and takes FOREVER to load... |
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GOOD
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OK, I'll take a poke at this and see if it all comes out in the luxurious manner I intended: An older woman: - Is experienced enough to know that there doesn't have to be any such thing as "same ol' sex". - Is imaginative enough to make certain that assertion is true, and - Is talented enough to be sure that she can keep each adventure going all night long. Oh, G? At 39, you are actually still a young lady. You are below my preferred age limit! Well, I DO make exceptions... Si Vis Pacem Para Bellum Audentes Fortuna Iuvat Politicians. Lampposts. Assembly Required.
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Crack a Walnut!!?? What a wonderful way to get the nuts warmed up! Do you roast them afterwards? I am SO looking forward to THAT meal
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9/30/2011 5:53 am |
As someone who is 23, I have to stick up for those under 30 lol. Sometimes Puppy will call me a young whipper snapper, and I get a little offended for being knocked on about my age. There are definitely young women who act like the young women described, but there's also older women who act like the younger women as well. There's always exceptions to the norm. I like to think I'm one of them Swimmy & Puppy Big News Milestone Windows to the Soul Coitus Interruptus Finding Love Here Yes, it39s possible ~Diving into the Mind~
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9/29/2011 8:26 pm |
Hey....WTF? Them statements sure look familiar...lol. Just messing with you G! Interesting spin on the original. You Go G! ...Don't Take It Serious - It's Only Humor... ....Hey guess what...I don't give a sh!t anymore....
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9/29/2011 4:35 pm |
When did an almost 39-year old become an older women? I am saddened by this turn of events. I blame Obama.
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9/29/2011 2:43 pm |
and older guys get here first..wait, that can be bad. I can't seem to get excited about younger women/girls...you, G are sensuality beyond words.
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(Herbal tea, my ass! These days, all you have to do is say "Wanna?") Really that is all it takes, and here I've been going at it all wrong. (Um. Yeah. I don't do this. Anymore.) Naughty, naughty Ring. But I suppose that if I think there is even a small chance that I will need them I carry an Altoids tin full of them. So I got ya covered. ** An older women takes charge of the situation. An older woman will call you up and ask you for a date. A younger woman will wait forever by the phone for you to call. Really? *watches his phone not ring* (I can crack a walnut. Nuff said.) Two things. First I have to say that I would like to see that. Second, now I'm a little afraid of what you could do to my well you know ... **Older women are experienced. They understand that sometimes, after 12 beers, a guy just can't get it up. A younger woman may need some time to grasp this fact. Beer? Who needs Beer? I'm sticking to water so that I'm good and hydrated for when it comes time to get it up. (Not applicable. If we see my friends in public, I may claim that you are mugging me.) And that is why I can't go to WI anymore. My face is on wanted posters for supposedly mugging you. And for anyone that doesn't know I'm kidding. **An older woman has lots of girlfriends ... and most of them will want to screw you too. Again I'm watching my phone not ring.
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very funny. my new smile for the day
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