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Blogs > jswonderful2010 > Alphasiren~ Swim with me~ |
No Fly Zone
No Fly Zone There is a constant flow of communication when you are entering into an open marriage/relationship. It is intense at first and can become tense throughout the time you are actively engaging in relationships with others. One of the main dynamics that needs to be established is your “no fly zone” What are your boundaries and can your partner support you in these limits? My St/Vk ( my nickname I have given my most amazing husband, Striking Viking) and I have two hard and fast no fly zones. No family members and no close friends. This makes sense to both of us. We are both blessed with very attractive friends and family! He comes from a family of very handsome and highly sexual men, (I scored with the best one!!) And I have a group of friends that are<b> red hot </font></b>sexy and beautiful. Needless to say, we had to deal with this issue very early in our negotiations as we opened our marriage. Relationships are crucial to us both. And that is why we have established these boundaries. Not to take away from the relationships and friendships we have developed along our path, but the old time cherished friendships and the family bonds we share are too close to each of us to take any risks with. Risks. Yes.. There are risks in open relationships. There are risks in any relationship. But to mitigate the amount of potential hurt and confusion you must be clear on what works for you and what does not. The thought of losing one of my long time friends or the possible amount of drama bringing a family member into our relationship is just not worth it. It feels like a potential set up for disaster. I am clear that the whole point of this opening of our relationship is to increase love and connection. And why would I not be receptive to including my friends or family in this adventure? Realistically, it just does not work for me at this point and it just feels better to both of us to keep these clear boundaries. We have run across some interesting boundaries that other couples have created for themselves. Some that we agree with and some that we do not. Many do not play or date separately. A few do not kiss anyone but their primary partner. Others agree not to engage in any intimate activities until all parties have met and get to know each other. With each relationship there are an unlimited amount of possible no fly zones to be explored. There has to be a genuine understanding between you and your sweetheart before moving forward and remember, even if you have agreed to hard and fast “no fly zones” anything and everything is still open for re-negotiation. This is the point where patience, flexibility and more overarching, huge love comes in very handy. People change. Energy shifts and that “human nature shit” can kick in at anytime. You know what I am talking about. So, be aware. Be supportive. and most importantly be loving~ Much love as always~ xoxoxoxoxoxoxo A/s Alphasiren~ Swimming through the waters of non traditional relationships~ |
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I added one in my relationships: none of my co-workers. If he's dumb enough to muddy his own company waters, I can't help that (but I will wonder why I'm with a guy so dumb)I'll be darned if I'm going to run the risk of dealing with the fall out if he dates on of *my* co-workers and things go pear shaped.
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