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Blogs > 40Deuce > Sherry Stringfield's ass in 93 |
Nuns versus amazons
Nuns versus amazons "It amazes me how people drive . A crash at 45 miles per hour has a fifty percent chance of being fatal even with seat belts and air bags and all that<b> jazz </font></b>- let people fly around at 90 miles per hour on their cellphone weaving in and out of lanes like its nothing . Like their lives are worthless . And the gag is their lives probably are worthless , but that's not why they're doing it ." 40Deuce Quoting yourself - that's coming in hot babycakes ! I wish I was better at grammar . If I say "shake your hips like battleships" I don't know if that means the hips are like battleships or the shaking is like the shaking of a battleship . I mean , am I saying ; A ) "Hey fatty , shake your fat hips " or B ) "Hey , shake your hips - specifically shake them to mimic the shaking of a battleship when it is at sea ." I don't know . And I hate when I don't know what I'm saying . Who I am kidding , I love it . Are battleships even a thing anymore ? I guess so Is there a porn version of Battleship yet ? If not you should make one . I'll write the script . I'm great at writing porn scripts . I saw a video of a lady I work with riding a sybian . It was pretty hot , I have to admit (well not really but I will) . Also do you really ride a sybian or do you merely use it ? You ride a bike , you ride a , you don't truly ride a fake cock attached to a saddle . Also am I spelling sybian correctly ? I think so . The internet told me this morning that England is lousy with nude gardening . Researching further (farther ? ) I discovered two things . First in England gardening doesn't seem to mean working in a garden , planting shit and so forth , it seems to mean instead just hanging out , reading the paper or eating breakfast or things like that . An secondly , as always , all the naked people are fat old men . And I get that , I love being naked - I'm naked right now - but aren't there any women nudist out there ? I suppose as a woman you spend so much of your time trying to fend people off of want you to take your clothes off that after a while it just seems weird to take them off voluntarily . Is there anything worse than when you read a blog for a really long time and you feel like you make a personal connection with someone and they post something really awful that you never would have expected from them and you realize that you don't really know them at all ? Yes , there is . But it still sucks . I keep getting e-mails for EXTREME bondage porn . Isn't "normal" bondage extreme enough for you people ? Where does it end ? Someone said "happy weekend" to me yesterday . First of all it was 8 AM on Friday . Second of all , what the fuck lady ? Happy weekend ? What does that even mean ? That sounds like something you'd see on a menu in a crummy Chinese restaurant . I think I need some rage pills . I get worked up over these things . My gal pal was trying to shove some twin porn at me the other day . One of the 78 things I don't get about porn is the whole twin thing . What's the appeal ? That its kind of y ? Even before I dated a twin I found that weird and afterwards it was super weird to me . I hated being around her and her sister because I was always afraid I was going to make a move on the wrong one . I remember her specifically asking one time "Why don't you ever touch me when my sister is around ?" Because I was never sure if it was you lady . Speaking of gal pal , we've reached the point in the relationship where she'll ask me something and when I answer she says "that makes me sad" and then she just stares at me for a while . Maybe (probably) its just my brain being a dick but I feel like this is what she's expecting to happen . Do you believe in God ? No , not really . That makes me sad . Oh , well then I'll start believing in him , nothing is more important to me than your happiness - not even my own free will . Especially not my own free will . And it wouldn't be a 40deuce blog without me pitilessly mocking my co-workers right ? The other day at work I heard a lady say "Did you know tree can die ? Like they only live for a certain amount of time and then they die ." So I guess she thought trees were immortal ? Which some of them can live a long time , I will grant you that . There's bristlecone pines that are verified to be over 5,000 years old . Think about that for a second today . That tree first started growing in 3000 BC . You know when our ancestors were first thinking "you know what would be a good idea ? instead of just holding everything in our filthy paws we could make some kind pot maybe ?" Your life is a blink of an eye to that tree . And there's a tree in Sweden that they think could be 10,000 years old . But trees are not immortal . There's a rapper called Immortal Technique . Which is disappointing because I always thought Immortal Technique was a method of giving a lady a really superlative orgasm . But its not , its just the name of a rapper . Unless maybe he's really good at getting the ladies "off" . Then it could be both I suppose . Putting first by putting employees first, immediately after prioritizing fiscal responsibilities and leveraging profitability towards exceeding by empowering our employees to put (and themselves) first, in a diverse and respectful environment of only those that come first, first. |
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"shake your hips like battleships" is grammatically correct but a really poor analogy. It exists, I suspect, only because of the rhyme. Immortal Technique is not a sexual term? Thanks - no happy weekend here, now. Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation bangs on the door forever!
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If I had my own private garden, I'd be hanging out in the nude all the time
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I saw a version of Battleship called Battleshots. My coworkers wonder if it would be possible to actually finish a game. Baobab trees live for a very long time. They live in the Sahara, but it wasn't a desert when they started growing. Club magazine from 1974 to 1978 had the most extreme weirdness imaginable. Ritual submission unto death, mummification, shit-blistering, Dr Karl Steiner was rather amusing as a columnist there. Almost every response started, "That's very dangerous." They didn't have the weird pictures, just weird text. Later they switched to an all pictures format. Maybe some people started actually reading it. Crosswords increase your vocabulary. Cross words increase your blood pressure.
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